What about that hair down there?

Nothing seems to divide the masturbator community more than the debate over trimming or shaving body hair. It seems to stem from that hyper-masculinity obsessed subdivision that likes to look down upon any man who dares to groom themselves around their penis. I see more men crying about how much hair each other has then even about penis size.

Personally, I love all masturbators and their penises, regardless of how they choose to wear their hair. I don't understand how a masturbator can criticize his fellow masturbator for doing something to his own penis to fuel his bate. I mean, that's the point, right? We all do things to enhance our bate. For those of us who are total batefreaks, it's almost all we think about. How can I get deeper into my penis bate? Well, if shaving or trimming might feel good to you, then go for it. I believe true Masturbators understand this. We do what we do to make our penises feel good. If another bator gets off on it then great, but our main goal is to please our own penis.

I get it, though. Some guys find a shaved or trimmed bush a total turn off and get boned by seeing a big, natural patch of hair around the shaft of a fully erect penis. Awesome. Leave yours as long as you'd like. Grow it out. Braid that shit if you want. Whatever makes you masturbate like a monkey is what's right for you. But don't go around wagging your finger at your brothers who get gooned out on a smooth shaft. It's their penis. It's their bate. Let them get as stoopid as they want without the judgment from their so-called "brothers". We're a small enough group as it is without insulting or singling each other out over something that grows.

As for myself, I tend to not trim very much. I usually leave my pubes but will shave my shaft. When I'm erect, my hair grows about halfway up my shaft because of how I was circumsized and it can be very uncomfortable when I try to masturbate with it that way. Shaving the shaft not only fixes this but helps me get that greasy goony feeling that I love so much with the help of Albolene. Every once in a while (like once every year or so) I'll shave or trim my bush. Mainly because I get the urge to just slather myself up with Albolene and get lost in a slimy, greasy goonerbate. I find the feeling of my hand sliding over my super slick, super smooth dong incredible. But I also love to have a nice thick patch of hair, sometimes. It all depends on what Penis wants at the time. I obey.

So let's get over ourselves and start encouraging our true masturbator brothers to get deeper and dumber in their bateholes by whatever gets them the gooniest, even if it's not something that fuels yours, like maybe shaving. Save the "real men have hair" bullshit for the rallies. Real men have a penis. Period.